One of those days

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It was today. I decided to not go to the studio to get things one around the house and to also get ahead with a commisison that I am working for a client. It was 10 am before I even started to create a list with the items that I wanted/needed to accomplish. It took 2 hours to get to that because the vortex called reading blogs from other people and wondering why I’m not accomplishing much, sucked me in. I also tried to make a cup of coffee. Knowing that I didn’t have milk in the house, I opted to use the cream that I purchased for the pretzels that I was also making for dinner. However, by the time the coffee had sat on my desk for two minutes the cream went off. The expiry date was August 9th. This is a strange thing that has been happening to us over the past few months. I bring stuff home that is bad, stuff goes bad way before the expiry date and I almost feel like not shopping anymore…. Can’t do that though.

So what did I get accomplished today? I made “Laugenbrötli” for the first time. That is pretzel with that nice deep brown covering on it and a nice amount of salt on top. When we where in Switzerland, we bought some of them just with butter inside and both Huxley and I loved them. So I tried to recreate that at home. They turned out quite nice. The next time though, I will use more “Natron” for the “Lauge”. Guess what I just figured out. Natron is Baking Soda… geesh, here I bought some of it in Switzerland, thinking that I just can’t find it here in Canada and meanwhile it is something that I’ve had in my cupboard all along….  I guess the next batch will be made with baking soda and I will see how they turn out. 

I also got the sketches for the client done, scanned and composed the e-mail. I contacted two of Huxley’s school friends and their parents for play dates, I reviewed the Waldorfschool papers for this coming term, I did knit a bit on the landscape Noro sweater I’ve been working on for about a year and a half, I just cleaned up the kitchen, I went to the doctor to have my elbow x-rayed and some other topics addressed, I got a present for my sister in law, who’s birthday it is tomorrow, I managed to have a nap, picked Huxley up early from daycare and accompanied daddy and him to the park for dinner (pretzel sandwiches, cucumbers and hummus dip). Now I’ve actually managed to compose another post. 

I have a whole bunch of crafty things to take pictures off and to share. I also have 21 new abstract pieces of work on the go at the studio. My solo show at the Magic Door Gallery has been confirmed with the opening taking place on October 25th between 2 pm and 5 pm. Gotta get to work! I’ve actually got a selection of pieces already on the go for the show, and I’m very excited about them. Oh, another thing I just remembered that I did today; I chose images for my promotional flyer that Richard is updating with new work. I need it for this weekend when I’m showing a few of my pieces at the Swiss National Holiday celebration. 

Here is a picture of Huxley with his hair newly shortened. He let me cut it last week and he just looks so cute. I only wanted to give him a trim, but he wanted it all short. Oh, my big boy….

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A blink in time

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March 30 was my last posting? That can not possibly be the case! However, it is what happens when we don’t have a real reason to do something. I get excited, want to do it, then wosh, time passes and out of all my good intentions is nothing, but a swish of energy that flits through my mind when I wake up or fall asleep. Guilty feelings for not living up to what I want to do.

April: A month to work on the next series of work. Booked our trip to Switzerland.
May: A cold month. Days spent in the studio. Working on the next series of work. At the end of the month, finally getting the garden in plantable shape. Sewed seeds, planted the tomatoes. Made Quilt/Blanket for Rachel.
June: A mad rush to get all kinds of things done before Huxley and I leave for Switzerland. Gardening, sewing clothes for myself. Getting goodies to bring to the old home country. Spending 2 weeks in Switzerland, reconnecting with a lot of my all-time favourite people. The first week we had only rain and cold, the second week it got sweltering hot. Huxley hurt his baby toe the day before we got back home – had to carry him, yet also got frontline service at the airport. Got back home and spend a week just getting back into the swing of Canadian time. Oh, yeah, brought back a lot of stuff, including a whole lot of felting wool. Richard turned 40, Huxley 4.Huxley-Oberhaltberg
July: Weeding, weeding, weeding. The garden looks great, the lawn looks a lot better this year than last year. Have a renegade zucchiniplant growing in the garden. This might be the year that I have plants. We haven’t seen any raccons this year, and in the past years we always saw a mother with at least 4 babies. So there is hope. Now we are back in the regular swing of things and although each week is not as regular as during the school year, we are doing good. 

Blured

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Teablur_2

Foggy lens over a hot steaming cup of tea at the studio, the lens about as foggy as my brain currently…

With the big show Toronto Art Expo on this week, my brain and the state of my affairs is all a blur. A week from today I will know how well the fruits of my labours have paid out. Not only am I trying to get all my new art pieces finished, I am also trying to use the curtain call of the show to sew some new outfits, a task very, very long overdue! I’ve been acquiring fabrics for about a year now and my mind has very definite ideas of the styles that I want. I’ll post some pictures when I’ve got something to show for.

Ponderings

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Gnomes07fair

In recent weeks I’ve been spending time thinking about my urge to create and putter. Before I gave birth to Huxley, I would virtually live at my studio, creating, puttering, always thinking of the next thing to do and explore.

Now, I still have the need to do it, but I seem to do most of the action in my head, not with my hands. I pour over books, wish for time to create, plan elaborate schedules to make things, even go as far as ordering supplies and make business plans (not real ones, but thinking about all the things I could make to sell). In my mind, I’m planning a whole new wardrobe to replace my old corporate rags. I go through bursts of energy where I think that I can create anything, that I will never sleep again, that I will just keep creating. I order way too many books, fill my brain with an ever-expanding repertoire of images, things, ideas. Yet when I have a bit of time, I squander it, or I am so exhausted that I don’t know where to start.

Is this simply a sign of being a mother? I do believe that there is this unseen link between mother and child that transfers energy and thoughts between us. Huxley will be 4 in a few months and I certainly have more time and energy than I have had for a long time, yet I just can’t get to create. I work 2 full days and 2 half days at my painting studio, and there I do make my mixed-media paintings. But I feel that my work is not growing as fast as I want it too. It’s not that I can’t focus on work because I miss Huxley, I’m actually happy to have this time to myself. I have shows to produce work for and galleries to keep happy, but beyond that, most things just stay locked in my brain. And they frustrate me.

The image at the top of this entry is of gnomes that I knitted for our Waldorf Schools’ Winterfair this past December. I made them at the studio while procrastinating from work on the paintings. So why not knit more at the studio? Because of the resin, I have to be very careful which fibres I work with, as these little ephemeral bits have a way of floating around and landing in the resin when it is wet.

On books: on the weekend I did a huge order of books from some of my online sources. I discovered a large number of items from my wish list for 1 penny each plus shipping. How can I not get them I wondered, and ordering them I did? Yet I also know that these books are in a way replacements for me not doing the actual creating. It is a vicious cycle… the more I want to create and make, the less time I find. Hence I’m overwhelmed and often do nothing. Huxleys’ bedtime is around 7:30 pm and if R puts him to bed, and if I go to the basement right away (where my sewing table is set up), I can usually go right up to midnight. But if I don’t get started before 7:30 pm, then I just want to sit down and rest or go to sleep.

Some people have remarked on how much stuff that I do get accomplished, yet to me, I see the potential in each day’s 24 hours and I only see all the things that must be possible to get done. I’m not beating myself up about it, but I am trying to get to know my mothering self and to find out what it is that I need to do to accomplish things. I also know that I spend too much time online, reading blogs, news, checking the weather, my mail, sourcing and perusing yet another idea. I know that I will find my path again, that as Huxley gets older, and that he will be less needy, but to think that our live just keeps going after having a child, is not my experience.